Marriage and social trust…
Stephanie Coontz, a history professor at Evergreen State College has an interesting Op-Ed in Tuesday’s New York Times in which she argues that social isolation is growing in America because couples invest so much in their marriages, and because married couples work longer than ever. There is nothing wrong in finding fulfillment and friendship within marriage she argues…but Americans also need to connect with community, and rebuild social ties with others, especially singles and the divorced.
This is an interesting argument in light of comments I’ve received from many readers that social isolation in America is growing, as it is in Japan. In Japan, of course, marriage is not the cement that keeps social connections alive. Instead, men seem to invest nearly all their social capital in relations forged around work, while women create their own vital network around children, school and hobbies. As I’ve noted in my book, the chasm between married men and women and Japan is vast, and seems to grow wider.
I continue to wrestle with the notion of why, if the construction of social trust is so different in the US than in Japan, that the sense of social isolation is actually growing in BOTH societies. I’d welcome more conversation on this point.